As I continue to re-issue posts from my first blog, an attempt before creating my current blog at http://vocationstory.blogspot.com (Pardon the gross self-promotion), I want to share an old prayer of discernment I'd written.

I was rather shocked at how much this spontaneous prayer sounded like the famous prayer of Thomas Merton. I had no clue who Thomas was or about his journey; I would have started reading his works immediately if I knew how much of his life pertained to my current way of thinking.

The post also provides a brief understanding of the importance of prayer. Sometimes we feel it’s hard to talk to God. How do we find the words to say what we truly mean?

There’s many different ways of praying...the hardest part is often making the time and the commitment. Even before knowing about the Divine Office, Lexio Divina, or the other numerous forms of prayer, I was able to use prayer as a reminder of my vocation – in hopes that I would keep this journey at the forefront of my mind.

Peace and all good, -V

Lord,

I am searching. I have heard your call; let me understand your plan for me so I can follow your way. I am so confused at this point, dear Lord. Help me have the patience to wait for your plan to become clear to me. Give me the strength to live in your footsteps, and grant me the courage to act when you plan is finally revealed to me...regardless of wherever it is.

Amen.

Something I’ve started since discerning is the ritual of prayer. It’s been a looong time since I’ve taken the time to talk to God, yet I’ve restarted the practice – in the morning and evening. I was late for work today, but even in my rush to get to work I took time to stop and pray...simply asking for God to reveal His plan for me and for the strength I so need in this hard time of my life.

The nature of prayer is honestly still a mystery to me. Sometimes prayer feels fulfilling, even inspiring. Other times I wonder if I’m praying to some Divine Answering Machine (begin your intentions after the beep).I don’t know if there’s a way I’m supposed to talk to God, or if depends on the situation.

In spite of the confusion, I still feel it is beneficial. I might only have started just recently, but it gives me a sense of peace and reminds me of my ultimate goal each day. I’m sure there are prayer books and structured methods to pray, however I’m not familiar with any of them, nor do I have any of those books. If all else fails, I still have my rosary.

I just hope I wake up with enough time tomorrow!

I have a confession, Readers. I have been putting my input into another blog. I pray that God and you all may find room in your ever-growing hearts to forgive me!

OK enough drama. Here's the deal:

About a week ago I got an invitation to help contribute to the Spirituality and Faith column at BloggersBase.com. The basis of their site is a competition forum for people to put in their blogs, get noticed, and possibly even get a shot at writing for a bigger blog and making money.

I've never written as a way to make money, however the opportunity to share my story on a wider scale has a benefit. Maybe I feel my story has merit, or maybe I just want everyone to know about me. I haven't quite figured it out yet, however this decision was made in the most self-less mindset I could reach.

So between dealing with this cold (thankfully I've finally gotten over it!) and learning how to use this new interface to write and publish my posts, I had to let this site suffer for a few days as I worked out the kinks.

Now I am up and running and have already written two posts (both of which I've already written 1 and 2, but in case you think you missed something, you can check them out here). I'm still figuring out how I can get readers to "cross formats," but I hope to have all the bugs worked out before getting to Allison Park next week.

Thanks for following along and dealing with my occassional absences. Remember if you see a blog (be it mine or someone elses) that really speaks to you, be sure to vote for it!

Pax!

Rich Reinhardt is one of my postulant brothers in the same level of formation as I am. He is also the director of the New Sanctuary Movement in Milwaukee, WI as an outreach to immigrants in this city. Working with the grass-roots group Voces De La Frontera, he has done major work in advocating for the cause of undocumented immigrants living in the U.S.

This evening he gave me a fact sheet that addresses many of the concerns that people in this country have about immigrants living in the U.S. borders. I decided to share this with all of you, in hopes that many myths surrounding immigration policy can be shown false and true dialogue can begin on the topic of immigration reform.

Myths and Facts on Immigration

"The great enemy of truth is very often not the lie - deliberate, contrived, and dishonest - but the myth - persistent, persuasive, and unrealistic."
-John F. Kennedy

MYTH: Increased border enforcement is the solution.
FACTS:

1. From 1986 to 1998, border patrol's budget increased six-fold and the number of agents doubled.
2. During the same time period, undocumented immigration doubled.
3. "Tougher enforcement" that pushes people to cross remote desert has lead to a humanitarian crisis on the border.
4. Experts, including the U.S. Government Accountability Office, have concluded that the continual and exponential increase in border-deaths which began the mid-1990's is directly related to an increase in U.S. border enforcement/border militarization. From 1995-2004 between two and three thousand bodies were found along the U.S.-Mexican border.
5. Causes of death for immigrants crossing from Mexico range from exposure and hypothermia to murder by vigilantes.

MYTH: Immigrants don't pay taxes.
FACTS:

1. Immigrants pay income, property, and sales tax using an ITIN (individual tax identification number.)
2. They pay between $90-$140 billion a year in federal, state, and local taxes.
3. They contribute $189 billion worth of wages recorded in the suspense file over the 1990's and two and a half times the amount of 1980's.
4. They contribute $6-$7 billion in Social Security tax revenue and about $1.5 billion in Medicare taxes per year.
5. While, as above, immigrants pay $90-$140 billion in taxes, immigrants receive only $5 billion in benefits, mostly through K-12 public schools and emergency medical care.
6. "Our assumption is that about three-quarters of other-than-legal immigrants pay taxes." (--Stephen C. Goss, Social Security's chief actuary, using the agency's term for undocumented immigrants.)

MYTH: Immigrants take jobs from American workers.

FACTS:

1. Immigrants have no net impact on unemployment rates. In states with the highest concentration of undocumented people there are actually lower unemployment rates.
2. Immigrants help create jobs through consumerism in automotive sales, electronic sales, restaurants, etc.
3. The Pew Hispanic Center has reported that, "Rapid increases in foreign-born population at the state level are not associated with negative effects on the employment of native-born workers.

MYTH: Immigrants don't want to learn English.
FACTS:

1. Demand for English classes at an adult level far exceeds the supply.
2. Within 10 years of arrival, 75% of immigrants speak English well.
3. 98% of Latino/Hispanic immigrants say it is important to teach their children English.
4. The rate at which immigrants today develop proficiency in English mirrors that of 19th and 20th century German, Italian, and Eastern European immigrants.
5. 91% of second-generation immigrants and 97% of third-generation immigrants are fluent or nearly fluent English speakers.

MYTH: Immigrants increase the crime rate.
FACTS:

1. Immigrants commit fewer crimes than native born Americans.
2. From 1994 to 2005 violent crime decreased by 34% and property crime by 32% as the immigrant population doubled.
3. First-generation immigrants are 45% less likely to commit violent crimes than Americanized, third-generation immigrants.

Sources

This fact sheet borrowed heavily from the website of Justice for Immigrants: The Catholic Campaign for Immigration Reform (under USCCB). Their website is www.justiceforimmigrants.org. Most of the original sources can be found there.

www.immigrationpolicy.org/index.php?content=B070201

Br. Ernie Bedard OFM Cap., a post-novice from the New York province, has decided to stake his claim on the internet with his new blog Reflections of a Capuchin Friar. Ernie is several years ahead of me in his journey to become a professed Capuchin friar, currently studying theology in Boston instead of Chicago like my province.

I encourage you all to take a look and give him a warm welcome. From the looks of his first post, he's got a great insight on our sense of Franciscan spirituality that may be beneficial to some of you. Hopefully he'll prove to the rest of you that not all the OFM Caps are crazy like I am!

You can find his blog here.

I've mentioned before that along with the community life and the ministry, I spend a good 2 hours a day in class here at the friary. Learning things from the life of Francis of Assisi, Liturgy, Biblical Criticism, the Catechism, and other important aspects of life as a Capuchin, my plate stay pretty full just with academics. There's never any grading done; at this stage of our formation I think they just want to make sure we'll do the work when it comes time for college and seminary.

So if you're looking to do some interesting reading, or you're just wondering what exactly I'm learning, here's a brief list of what I'm currently working on.

Catholic Social Teaching - One of the most important aspects of being a Capuchin is learning to be in community with all people, especially those that have been marginalized by society. Catholic Social Teaching is an integral part of how we choose to live out our charism and spread the Gospel message.

Rerum Novarum - Papal Encyclical from Pope Leo XIII in 1891. This is the basis for Catholic social justice today. It's relevance remains as we continue to see the effects of urbanization, polarization of classes and cultures, and the oppression of people in this world.

Along with Rerum, I've also read through Octogesima Adveniens, otherwise known as the "Call to Action" Encyclical from Pope Paul VI. Not only does this show the relevance of Rerum at the time of it's writing (1971) but gives specific directives for the faithful to engage in social justice. Paul VI is critical of Free Market society, leading to Individualism, but also warns against the siren song of Socialism and Marxism.

After reading both encyclicals, I realized I wanted to know even more about these systems, and why The Church always seems to have this "middle of the road" approach towards Capitalism and Socialism. So, for better understanding, I bought 3 more books:

For a better understanding of the ideology and to better digest why The Church gave it's critical description to both Communism and unchecked Capitalism, I thought it best to go to the source. For Christmas, my mom bought me The Communist Manifesto and Das Kapital by Karl Mark and Fredrick Engels. For the other side of the spectrum, I bought the "Bible of Free Market Thinking": The Wealth of Nations by Adam Smith. I'm still awaing their arrival from Barnes & Noble.

Over Christmas break, I also had to read and discuss a more recent encyclical, this one from Pope Benedict XVI. Deus Caritas Est (God is Love) was a surprise for the Pope's first encyclical. Many in the Catholic community thought he would write something more about the Magisterium or Truth, rather that something about eros and agape. Nonetheless, it is an excellent encyclical to understanding love in the grander scheme of faith, to recognizing the need not only for justice but for charity, and towards understanding how "Love of God" and "Love of neighbor" are much the same thing.

Along with these books, we're reading in preparation for Biblical study and criticism. This does not mean we're going to start tearing the Bible down, but it does mean that we will start looking at it through a better lens and try to understand when it was written. The metaphor for this process is "getting behind the Word." This stack of books could easily be found in any seminarian curriculum:

Interpreting Scripture by Walter Vogels. An introduction to understanding the need for exegesis and the different ways that is possible for us.

Interpreting the New Testament by Daniel Harrington. A more in-depth look at form criticism, redaction criticism, literary criticism, parallel texts, and the different tools available to get at the meaning behind the text.

New Testament Fundamentals by Stevan L. Davies. This is the application of exegesis on New Testament scripture. I'm still finishing the book by Harrington, so I cannot give you a further description, other than it takes the tools we've learned and begins to apply them to the Gospel, epistles, and to the Apocolypse text.

Reading the Old Testament by Lawrence Boadt is the biggest book we have to read, and for obvious reasons. This book is much like Davies book, except for the obvious difference. Thankfully we only have to read selected chapters from this book.

Last, but definitely not least, we have a book that needs to be read before the end of January. We in Milwaukee will spend a few weeks with the guys in the New York province at their friary (I haven't been to NYC in years!) While we are there, we will have a week long course regarding the Eucharist. Before that time, we need to read From Age to Age: How Christians Have Celebrated the Eucharist. I haven't even thought about picking up this book yet, however I'm eager to read it just like everything else.

I would suggest all of these books (yes, even the ones about Socialism and Communism!) if you are looking to gain a better understanding of your faith, living your faith in a sometimes troubled world, or if you're interested in Scripture and would like to gain a better understanding of the Word.

Wish I could write more; but as you can see I'm quite busy.

Among many of my different tasks as a postulant is to do plenty of reading. The life of Francis of Assisi alone is an omnibus broken into three different books to study. These next two weeks we are focusing on the Catechism.

It's been a while for many of us, but during this year we will make our way through the entire Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC). For some of the guys, the list of rules and doctrines is rather boring and hard to grasp. Fortunately for me, much of this book is rather fun to read for me.

The USCCC presents the CCC in a way that's much easier, practical, and smoother to read and digest. Not only does it give a concise explanation of the different doctrines, but gives history, examples, and even questions that one may have in regards to any given catechism.

A few other books that I read along with the required readings are the Holy Quran, several books on spirituality including The Holy Longing by Ronald Rolheiser, the history of the Capuchin Franciscans, and the heavy Code of Canon Law.

Some people make fun of the fact that I'm eagerly reading about Canon Law. "Be careful reading that book," one of the friars told me. "They (the order) may want you to become a canon lawyer!" While much of canon law is related to marriage and annulments these days, I do see a ministry opportunity there as well. There are many people who are away from the Church because of marriages that didn't work out and were not able to get an annulment. While there are strict rules regarding these actions, there's a part of me that sees these people being marginalized from the Church. Sometimes I wonder if all those defections from the Catholic faith that I hear about stem from a person's inability to practice their faith because of a divorce.

I'm not a supporter of divorce or even having kids out of wedlock; hell I made it to age 33 without either of those events transpiring in my life. However as I live this life, I'm forced to look at things from a new perspective. I've stopped seeing just the "right and wrong," rather I try to look for ways to bring all people back to the faith.

These are big questions that require big discussions and a lot more reading. If there's only one absolute I can write this evening, it is that reading has got my mind going, and I'm excited to be learning once again.

Intercession: Christ our light, brighten your Church with your splendor, so that it may be for the nations the great sacrament of your love.

After serving 8 years, Dr. Jack Kevorkian, a.k.a. "Dr. Death" walked as a free man in Coldwater, MI yesterday. Reports say his declining health condition was a significant part in his parole. Read the complete story here...

For most fence-straddling Catholics, assisted suicide is an attractive dish on the cafeteria of morality. "If God is good, why would he allow suffering? Why should someone in pain continue to live? Why should we artificially prolong the life of someone who is already going to die?" Since the question of continuing care is still new, many people are unsure where exactly the church stands on these issues.

Fr. Kevin O'Rourke, OP, JCD, STM is an author, esteemed college professor, award-winning expert in the field of bio-ethics, and he can still tell a good Irish joke at age 80. A modest Dominican friar, it's easy to see that Fr. O'Rourke knows his stuff. Starting off as dean of the Aquinas Institute of Theology, he was moved to tackle the issues of medical ethics after Roe v. Wade. Whether you're looking for the "proper Catholic position" on a medical topic or you just want to hear a good story, Fr. O'Rourke is your man.

While popular media tends to polarize the argument of continuing medicine, the question of assisted suicide is not as two-sided as the esteemed Dr. Kevorkian would have us believe. Fr. O'Rourke states that "...much of the disagreement and misunderstanding in regard to ethical decisions often seems to stem(sic) from a lack of clear distinctions."(source) In his essays, Fr. O'Rourke explains how complicated the situation actually is, and where Catholic doctrine fits in:

• there is no difference between active or passive euthanasia. Since the purpose of both are to end human life, both forms are unethical and therefore require no distinction

• the concepts "grave burden" and "quality of life" apply not just to a patient's physical state, but to their emotional, psychological, and spiritual state,

• euthanasia has become more acceptable to society because of factors like prolonged medical treatment, the recognition of physiological burden only, not understanding God and suffering, and a sense of "control," that a customer has the "right" to choose if they want someone to help them die.

And that's where we must give props to Dr. Kevorkian: for packaging such a controversial topic in a way the American public likes..."It's your right to choose." In a world where we can't control the price of gas, the politicians we elect, or the popularity of Paris Hilton, someone tells us "We have the right to die!" and we cheer this new martyr before realizing how morbid the message actually is.

Before planting your foot down on either side of Dr. Kevorkian's crusade, get the straight dope from another doctorate holder.

Essays by Fr. O'Rourke, O.P.