Back in the day when I sold cars, I worked at two speeds: stop and full bore. When I am into something, I jump in and give everything I can to it...the figurative "110%." Not long after becoming a Postulant here in Milwaukee, I realized that things haven't changed much.
I've received a lot of positive feedback about the Vocation Update that I wrote for the province (check here). Many of the responses I've gotten echo the same sentiment: "Man, you need to slow down a little bit!"
There are times that I wonder if I choose to work this way because it is truly my personality or maybe I'm trying to prove something to others. Do I work hard because I feel there is a genuine need, or am I hoping to impress people with my piety and devotion to the Order? Is my work a way to escape or perhaps cover-up something about myself that I don't like?
I sit with these questions at times, trying to offer them to God for some kind of resolution. I hear only the call to work for those who can't help themselves, to be a voice for those that cannot speak up...to be an example for others to continue the work I've started.
This week I have another full schedule: tomorrow I go to MSDF (Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility) for jail ministry, I have a full week at St. Ben's, Friday I have a Plunge Event that will carry over until Saturday morning, I need to ship a return package, submit my budget for the month, music practice tomorrow at 7:00 PM, and have Chapters 9 & 10 of the CCC read by Tuesday.
With so much to do, how can one not run at 110%?
Ant: You have left everything to follow me; you will have it all returned a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.